A life well lived: Virginia Nelson

Jenny Beth, my Mom

When Tomorrow Starts Without Me

David Romano

When tomorrow starts without me
And I’m not here to see
If the sun should rise and find your eyes
Are filled with tears for me

I wish so much you wouldn’t cry
The way you did today
While thinking of the many things
We didn’t get to say

I know how much you love me
As much as I love you
And each time you think of me
I know you’ll miss me too

But when tomorrow starts without me
Please try to understand
That an angel came and called my name
And took me by the hand

And said my place was ready
In Heaven far above
And that I’d have to leave behind
All those I dearly love

But when I walked through Heaven’s gate
I felt so much at home
When God looked down and smiled at me
From His great golden throne

He said this is eternity
And all I promised you
Today your life on earth is past
But here it starts anew

I promise no tomorrow
For today will always last
And since each day’s the same way
There’s no longing for the past

So when tomorrow starts without me
Don’t think we’re far apart
For every time you think of me
I’m right here in your heart

The power of simplicity

It’s Fall;
Sun is bright,
Skies delight;
Breezes insist;
Greens persist;
Yellow beams;
orange screams;
red glows;
Browns repose.
It’s Fall, after all

Jenny Beth Nelson    October ’16                                                                                                              (my Mom)

The cost of loyalty

I’ve been thinking a lot about loyalty lately.  Not in the context of political parties or militant groups, just loyalty in general and what role it plays in my life. So I decided to visit Webster’s Dictionary and see how it is defined.  Here’s what Mr. Webster says:

“…fidelity, allegiance, fealty, loyalty, devotion, piety…faithfulness to something….loyalty to which one is bound by pledge or duty… fidelity, implies strict and continuing faithfulness to an obligation, trust, or duty, marital fidelity.“

Well, then I had to look up piety.  And obligation.  And fealty.  You get the picture.  All the definitions come back to a similar theme, a human connection that is ever-present and is clearly ingrained in one’s character DNA.  You either have it or you don’t.

Or do you?  Is it something you can develop?  Is it learned? If you don’t have it, is it considered a character flaw?  Well, yes.  And no.

As with most of my life, examples of loyalty are best described through dogs.  I am first and foremost loyal to my dogs.  Barney, Bubba, Elvin, and Buddy have passed over that ever- elusive Rainbow Bridge.  Harvey, the Yellow Dog, remains steadfast by my side.  While I have always been loyal to them, I sometimes questioned their loyalty to me….until dinner time.  That was when I knew they were as loyal to me as their DNA would allow.  Whether they entered my life as a puppy (Barney and Harvey) or through a rescue (Buddy, Bubba, and Elvin), I pledged my loyalty to them the instant our eyes met.  That is in my DNA.

My loyalty to humans?  Let’s just say it has “evolved”.  I suppose loyalty is relative, what defines loyalty to one is not necessarily loyalty to another.  What I do know for sure is that loyalty matters, it is the one defining quality that speaks to a person’s character.  Because of loyalty, you remain honest.  Because of loyalty, you speak the truth.  Because of loyalty, you are trustworthy.  Because you are loyal, the same is shown to you.  There is an underlying theme here, right?

A few years ago I learned a valuable lesson about the significance of loyalty and it’s role in a friendship.  While I thought I was loyal to my friends, on a couple of different occasions the opportunity presented itself to demonstrate that loyalty and I failed miserably.   The details don’t matter but suffice to say; I didn’t show up when I should have. I didn’t defend when I should have.  And I jumped to the wrong conclusion when I should have asked better questions.  Grateful and thankful that I was given the chance to right those failures, I believe it was a lesson well worth the pain and angst I caused…mostly to myself.  It resulted in seriously evaluating the importance of loyalty and the significant role it plays in my life.  Most importantly what I learned is when given the opportunity to demonstrate loyalty, much like Nike therapy, just do it.

To those who have shown me loyalty, I thank you.  And to those who have not, I thank you.  Lessons learned are lessons learned be they from a positive angle or from a negative angle.  Fortunately, my best learned lessons have come primarily from the positive angle.

Inevitably, there is a cost to loyalty.  But the reward is where I choose to focus.  In 1910 Teddy Roosevelt spoke about “the man in the arena…the doer of deeds…who spends himself in a worthy cause”.    One hundred five years ago, Teddy was on to something.  Being in the arena is much like being loyal.  And much like being in the arena, loyalty can lead to failure, rejection, and possible heartache. Ultimately, the cost of not being in the arena is so much higher than actually being in the arena.

And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

An epic annoyance

Pet peeves.  I don’t want to have them, they are an irritation that creep into my activities of daily living.  After perusing the internet to discover the origin of the phrase, I find that it dates back to the 1920’s.

Wikipedia, the site with which many grains of salt must be taken ,says:

“…first usage was around 1919. The term is a back-formation from the 14th-century word peevish, meaning “ornery or ill-tempered”.  Pet peeves often involve specific behaviours of someone close, such as a spouse or significant other.

Sounds very British to me, they can make words like detritus (garbage) sound appealing.  I think most pet-peeves are perpetrated by people we don’t know.  It is much easier to wax indignant at those we have no interest or investment in than those we do.

I would have to say my biggest pet peeve is perpetrated by those people who do not put the shopping carts back into the cart-corral after unloading said cart.  They just leave the cart out in the parking lot, or my favorite, they hang it up on a curb that is two feet away from the corral.  My perspective: it is the ultimate definition of narcissism.

Perhaps a bit harsh?  Maybe.  However, the self-centered, self-obsessed, self-absorbed, egotistical, my-time-is-too-valuable behavior exhibited in such a simple activity as NOT returning a cart to where it belongs smacks of disrespect.  Disrespect for other peoples property, disrespect for those whose job it is to gather randomly placed carts, and disrespect for shopping cart-etiquette.  And the decline  of courtesy.

There is a  bigger picture to those pet peeves that are a result of discourteousness.  I think I just made up a new word.  I believe courtesy is  a gene present at birth and cultivated by family and friends through example and opportunity.  As in, following someone’s example and finding opportunites to practice the act of courteousness. The practice of courtesy is becoming convoluted, but not yet extinct.  There can be a revival of courteousness.  “Courtesy Matters”.   “Give Courtsey a Chance”.   The possibilities are endless.  But it starts with Nike Therapy, just do it.

At the end of the day (literally),  more courteousness equals fewer pet peeves. Fewer pet peeves equals a more tranquil life.  I think I may have the key to solving some major world problems.  Courtesy, the antidote to annoyance.

So, let’s review the rules of shopping cart-etiquette.  Very simply the rules are: return it to the corral when you are done with it.  Simple.  I guess it is just one rule.  Even better.

Me

This website is the new version of what a diary use to be. I’m just a girl who is trying to find health, wealth, and happiness and choosing to share along the way.  I have chosen to remove the proverbial lock attached to that old fashioned diary. I live in Reno Nevada, “The Biggest Little City in the World” as it is known. I work as a Registered Nurse Clinical Research Coordinator for the VA and in surgery at the local trauma center.

My world presently revolves around a 13 year old yellow lab named Harvey. He has had my back his whole life by bringing joy and a sense of calm when life seems out of control. He has taught me that health wealth and happiness reside at the end of a well executed retrieve. It’s really that simple, fetch a ball, fetch a pheasant, fetch a life.